1.16.2012

How are you filling in the gap?

Yesterday was my first official day serving on the Greeting team at our new home church, Destiny! I am super excited about this (maybe overly excited, but that is okay!)

Last week we started a new series called "Life Apps"...it is fabulous! It is basically saying, don't just hear The Word, but DO The Word. This series could not have come at a better time, God's timing is so sweet!

But today, as the first words of the message were spoken, I knew God had planned this....and I felt like it was right towards me. After an intense conversation yesterday with Kory, I was really asking God to just help me see the best in people and believe the best in people. (This is an area that we-God and I- have really been concentrating on lately.) We were focused on 1 Corinthians, the Love chapter. I will fast forward....

Look at the diagram below....

[Expectations                                                        Experience]


As you can see, there is a pretty large gap between Expectation and Experience. Our expectation is what we expect, and the experience is what is happening. Keep that in mind, we will come back to this.

I have come to see that often (not all the time, but a good percentage of the time) I assume the worst. Why? I don't know. Is it natural? Is it normal? I don't know. In a way I think it is a normal tendency for humans. Not a good one though. I have been reading Joyce Meyer's book we talked about, "Power Thoughts" & I feel like this book and this topic actually come in together. Usually when your're thinking negative about situations, the negative will come to exist. 

I believe that filling the gap with Believing the best will bring a positive outcome. Maybe not all the time, maybe you were believing the best in that person or situation and it turned out the total opposite. What do you do then? Do you not say anything and stay and possibly get walked on? Or you confront?  When you  can't choose to trust, you must choose to confront.  And not in a "boy/guh whatchu been doin I gonna slap yo freckles off that ugly face"...No definitely not like that!! ..(I really just caught myself saying that out loud..) You say "hey, I want to trust you to do what you say. I am really confused about this, please help me understand."  This is asking for an explanation and assuming there's a good one. 


  • Love gives the other person the benefit of the doubt
  • Love looks for the most generous explanation for the other person's behavior (Over the top, extra view of believing other)
  • Love chooses trust over suspicion



  • When there is a gap between what I expected and what I experienced, I will believe the best.
  • When other people assume the worst about you, I will come to your defense.
  • If what I experience begins to erode my trust, I will come directly to you. 
  • When I'm convinced I will not be able to deliver on a promise, I will inform you ahead  of time.
  • When you confront me about the gaps I've created, I will tell you the truth. - May not be the best answer, but it's the truth. Builds relationship.


What you put in the gap, changes everything
When you do it God's way, it opens the door to build relationship.
Choose to love=Choose to believe the best in people.

Over the past year, I have really caught myself not believing the best in people. Not looking for the best in them. I am sure it has done some damage or caused issues in friendships/relationships. I have realized this and I am now striving each and everyday to Believe the best in people. 

How do you fill in the gap?

1 comment:

  1. Can I just say that I really needed to read this:

    "Love chooses trust over suspicion"

    SO GOOD.

    You're awesome...just sayin :)

    xo!

    ReplyDelete